Sunday, December 19, 2010

Behold the moral arc bending towards justice...

Civil rights leader, Martin Luther King once said, "When our days become dreary with low-hovering clouds of despair, and when our nights become darker than a thousand midnights, let us remember that there is a creative force in this universe, working to pull down the gigantic mountains of evil, a power that is able to make a way out of no way and transform dark yesterdays into bright tomorrows. Let us realize the arc of the moral universe is long but it bends toward justice." Yesterday, in a 65-31 vote in the US Senate, the recent bastion of hopelessness where most legislation dies in a filibustery death, a 17-year old policy that has ended the careers of thousands of Americans was itself ended. Don't Ask, Don't Tell was legislatively voted down 65-31.

This blog is usually the forum by which I rant and rave about social injustice, as I did about this issue in May of this year:
http://pooniethegreat.blogspot.com/2010/05/revolution-is-scary-but-evolution-is.html

Much of what I said then is true today and will be true when the policy is finally enacted by our nation's military forces. A part of me is somewhat saddened by the fact that I will most likely not be in the military when this policy is lifted to see and support my gay and lesbian brothers and sisters in arms finally serve their country without the threat of having their careers involuntarily ended for something as benign as who they love. But as I was watching the initial procedural vote yesterday, where the Senate was voting on whether to allow the repeal vote to occur, I was riveted. So many times, the repeal of this policy seemed certain, only for our hope to be pulled away like Lucy does to Charlie Brown. Counting the names of Senators that said "Yes" to ensure that there will be no filibuster... I found myself shocked and awed when the little tick marks I wrote on a piece of scrap paper reached 60. True, this did not mean that the repeal was passed. There still needed to have been another vote. But, once it was past filibuster, DADT was dying.

While I was unable to watch the actual final vote from the Senate regarding repeal, I was checking my Twitter feed constantly... and when 65-31 popped up. I felt a profound sense of joy and damn near had tears well up in my eyes. It was like if simutaneously the Chicago Bears, Chicago Bulls, Chicago White Sox, Chicago Blackhawks, Chicago Fire, and Chicago Red Stars all simutaneously won their respective league championships by a score of 65-31. I stared at my phone and realized that the military I will be leaving WILL be better than the one I had joined. And the gay and lesbian comrades that I have, will have a career that will not be cut short by a policy that has a foundation in irrational discriminatory rhetoric that does not stand the test of logic or moral justice. And for once, my hope in humanity was not diminished by the news of a day, but in fact strengthened. The spirit of the season is amplified in my soul. Thank you Patrick Murphy, Nancy Pelosi, Joe Lieberman, Susan Collins, Harry Reid, and all of the Republican Senators that chose on correct side of history and did not lock step with conservative talking points.

It will be interesting to see what will happen in the coming months and the coming years. There are no doubt countless people who saw the vote yesterday with feelings of dread to feelings of intense hatred for what has happened to "their military." To them I say, it is not YOUR military. It is OUR military. And the Pentagon survey has indicated that OUR military, for the most part, does not care if The Gay is among us. There will be growing pains, as there always is with change. But anyone who knows the military knows that we make things work, no matter what.

Something that profoundly disturbed me yesterday was listening to the irrational ramblings of a man whose time of coherent thought has long passed. While I respect his career, his life, and his experiences in the military... Senator John McCain's testimony regarding the repeal of DADT was hurtful to the gay and lesbian men and women that are serving and that have served our nation's military. And the even sadder part? There are those that believe and support him in his homophobic fears of a military that will collapse because the guy or gal next to you is gay.

The repealing of Don't Ask, Don't Tell will not result in a gay pride parade sprouting up in the hallways and battlefields near you. For straight people, the repeal of DADT WILL NOT AFFECT YOU. True, you may see your co-worker or battle buddy display pictures of their real significant others or tell you the truth about what they were doing last weekend and who their "roommate" or "best friend" really are. Does that change the fact that you are still straight? Does that change the fact that your co-worker or battle buddy is still the same person that they were before you saw that picture and before they told you the truth about who they love? No and no. The laws and regulations regarding professional behavior are still in effect. You will not get raped in the shower. You will not get hit on and sexually harassed. You will not be forced to abandon your religious beliefs. These things will not happen any more than they do now. Because gay or straight, rape, sexual harassment, and sexual assault will be as illegal post-DADT as it was pre-DADT. Your religious beliefs will not be compromised any more than they are now. Gay people will not blockade your route to church, they will not take away Christmas or your birthday. Gay people will just be the guy or gal that you've worked with pre-DADT. Most gay people probably won't even come out to you. You're not that important or special. Get over yourselves.

For gay people, the post-DADT world is one where they can truly embrace the Core Values that they have signed up for. Loyalty, Duty, Respect, Selfless Service, Honor, Integrity and Personal Courage for the Soldiers. Honor, Courage, and Commitment for the Sailors and Marines. Integrity, Service, and Excellence for the Airmen. There will no longer be the fear that if someone saw you with the wrong person at the wrong time at the wrong place that your career can be jeopardized. People can truly thank their friends and real families at ceremonies. People can go to functions with someone they care about without reprecussions. No, that is not "rubbing it in the faces" of straight people. It's equality. Happiness is not exclusive to straight people.

And on both sides of the issue, I really hope that the inherent idiocy of humanity does not rear its ugly head too much. There will be incidents. There will be bad seeds ruining things for the good. We must keep in mind that not all straight people are bigots. And not all gay people are on the extreme end of the rainbow. It will be through the strength of leadership that the post-DADT world can exist and that there will be equal punishment for the homophobes and the homosexuals, should either act like fools. Now is time to not just be appointed leaders, but to be real leaders and look your peers and subordinates in the eye and say, "No, do your job or find another one." And if you can't do that... maybe you should seek employment elsewhere as well. Because if that's the case I can do your job better.

I look forward to the coming months and years. It is a whole new world opening up but yet it's merely the fulfillment of an old world promise:

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Hey, Royal Highness? Care to join the rest of the world?

I spent the week contemplating a rant in which I list all the political things I believe in to demonstrate that I am far less nutty than some of the political candidates out there. And perhaps in hopes that if I'm ever fired from my current job, I can be someone's write-in campaign for political office. But seeing as my network of fans can fit into a small elevator... my grass roots campaign is less grass rootsy and more non-existenty. However, I'm sure many of you are aware of my political leanings and if you guys still want to see that list posted, please reply. But, with that said... Please get out to vote on November 2nd. If you're military and have absentee ballots, please send them in. No one seems to care about midterm elections but they're very important in getting things done for the people we elected during the Presidential election years. And all I'll say to that is, "Suck it, Tea Party... I like taxes, because it pays my salary and buys my fellow people in uniform shiney things."

So anyways... onward to the actual rant!

Sometimes I think I might really be crazy. I can take myself mentally completely out of a situation and look at it objectively. I can look at a situation, and mentally pan back to a third person point of view and think, "Wow, this can be hilarious from someone else's point of view!" When a decision needs to be made or an argument is going on, I can see both points of view. That's generally how I am. Don't get me wrong, I will argue with you to the death if I believe in something passionately enough and throughly love the process of arguing... but when it is all said and done, I can generally concede points that you win. The only exception to this is if I'm in a bad mood and PMSing, then everyone can Go F*ck Yourself! (Still think I should make bracelets that say GFY on them and sell them... any potential buyers? You can just tell people it says, "Go Find Yourself.") Apparently this mental ability is not very common...

This had me thinking about how many people are just in their own little world, unwilling or perhaps unable to realize the third person's perspective upon their actions. Westboro Baptist Church, I'm talking about you. And I'm also talking about people who do the following things:


1. People who write checks while checking out.

This is usually done by older people, who may or may now know how to use or may or may not trust ATMs. And if you're below the age of the AARP demographic... What'S YOUR Deal?!? But really? You knew you were going grocery shopping when you pulled your car into the parking lot, turned off the engine, got out of your car, and started walking into the store. You couldn't have at least filled out most of the check? Like maybe the date and who the check is for? You should at least know THAT much prior to entering the establishment. And perhsps that little memo line? if you like filling that part out? So all you'll have to do is put a monetary amount on the check and sign it and be on your way? But rather than doing that, you stand there... digging for your check book... asking the cashier what the date is... how to spell the name of the store... slowly writing out your last will and testament on that memo line... all while I'm standing behind you with a rotisserie chicken that belongs less on the conveyor belt and more in my belly. So, next time you feel compelled to write a check, please have the decency to realize that the more time you take... the more people are standing in line behind you... waiting for you. You. You, who are at that very moment, stopping the progress of humanity. Think about that.


2. Peeple who can't park.

I know I have little room to speak on this matter being Asian and female, but bear with me. I am aware that there is truth to the stereotype. However, I highly doubt that the Dually Crew Crab Pickup Truck with a Hemi engine, a 3 foot lift, and a Confederate flag in the back window belongs to any Asian female driver. Why the hell does your truck need to take up 3 parking spaces? What the hell is so special about your overgrown Tonka truck that it can not possibly risk anyone parking near it? Or are you THAT inept at driving that you're actually being called out by an Asian female driver? And this doesn't just apply to the big ridiculous Overcompensation-Mobiles. Why can't people put their cars in parking spots and not be diagonal or taking up another space? Unless you're a cop, ambulance, firefighter, or perhaps Knight Rider.... you have the time to re-park your crooked vehicle... or else you'll be mocked by Asian female drivers...




3. Slow walkers... in packs...

While it is true that pedestrians have the right of way... that doesn't mean you get to amble your way across the intersection slowly, holding up traffic. Or if you're just walking slowly in general, please at least make it easier for someone in a hurry to try and pass you. There is no reason that you and your posse needs to walk places like you're in West Side Story, in a line, creating a game of Red Rover for the people around you. Again, impeding the progress of humanity. You. Stop. Or actually... move. Faster.


4. Loud talkers.

Ca-CAW!!! Ca-CAW!!! SQUAWK!!!! No, these are not the sounds of a bird-watching trip... this is what you sound like when you're talking loudly about stupid things. I don't care that your child is a freshman in college this year... I don't care that you lost your virginity in your roommate's bed back in 1805 when you were a freshman in college... I don't care that you ran out of Vagisil wipes. I don't. When I can hear... word for word... what your conversation is and judge your idiocy level from afar, there is something wrong. While, I admit, my friends and I get into some shenanigans and get rather rowdy, but never EVER are we having what apparently seems like a serious conversation on a what appears to be a loud speaker embedded in our mouths. Please... If I can Mystery Science 3000 your conversation, there is a problem.


5. People who don't realize that they're laughed at...

If you do the above things and don't feel guilty or don't realize that I'm talking about you... *face palm* I'm sorry. If you're a Friendship Predator and don't know how to fix yourself... I'm sorry. I enjoy mocking you. You are the reason, "What's YOUR Deal?!?" exists. I want to eliminate you from society, but you fuel my theraputic rantings. Your obliviousness to the world around you is a plague that threatens to consume the world. How much more clear can I be? YOU ARE THE REASON I WROTE THIS RANT!

It's disappointing that most people don't realize how the world views them. Groups like the Westboro Baptist Church that protest military funerals and claim that people die because God hates that America loves its gay people... dont' realize that their message makes no sense in the context of everyone else. Politicians that campaign against taxes and infrastructure improvements while complaining about how the roads and public transportation suck rarely get called out. The world is filled with these people... that are completely clueless that they're a joke. Every single day, we encounter these people are shake our heads. Are you one of them?

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Things I Don't Care About...

What's YOUR Deal?!? was originally created as a weekly editorial for the UIC Today, a now-defunct student-run newspaper for the University of Illinois at Chicago. I always knew that I wanted to write and I figured that bored people would need things to read in class, on their commute, or even in the bathroom. Apparently, I developed quite a following and the things I wrote that called out the idiotic behavior of those very people that read my column apparently was amusing to them. Who knew? Did I make a difference? Did people change their behavior for the better? I have no idea. I've been writing editorials since high school. So, for over a decade, I've ranted and raved about things that bother me, ranging from people leaving shopping carts in parking lots, burger misalignment, and the airline industry to more serious topics like politics, Don't Ask Don't Tell, Sarah Palin, and the ever ridiculous Westboro Baptist Church. It would appear that I care about a lot of things and that I get worked up about little things in life. While that may be true... this edition of What's YOUR Deal?!? is an incomplete listing of things that I do NOT care about. I say incomplete because, well... there may be things that I don't care about that didn't even pop into my brain, and I reserve the right to not care about it more in the future... Anyways, onward to the countdown!

5. Infomercials.

While they are infinitely entertaining...



I don't think I can ever find myself seeing an infomercial and saying to myself, "OH MY GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE I AM INCAPABLE OF POURING MILK INTO MY CEREAL WITHOUT A PRODUCT THAT I CAN GET FOR 10 EASY PAYMENTS OF $9.95!!!" Sorry, Ron Popeil, Billy Mays, and the Sham Wow dude... I don't care about you. But I will laugh at things like this though:



"Whew... that's it..."


4. Your religion.

I am Buddhist. I don't really understand why people think that is a religion, because it's really not. It's more a proactive way of life. I don't do things because a book tells me not to, I don't do things because I think they're a bad idea. Likewise, I do things because I think it's a good idea... all by my lonesome. I don't have a problem with people and their religions. In fact, Buddha has been quoted as saying:

"Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it."

That makes sense to me and that is why I do the things I do and believe the things I do. I really don't need people telling me I'm going to hell or argue with me using their version of moral judgement on the world. I don't care. I don't care if you're Christian, Catholic, Jewish, Muslim, Mormon, Hindu, Buddhist or whatever. This doesn't mean I don't respect your religion and your beliefs. I will never go out of my way to offend you, but if you're a member of the Westboro Baptist Church or any other such group.... GAME ON! If you find the Bible, the Koran, or whatever words of Jebus (yes, Jebus) soothes your soul, then go for it. You have the right to believe in whatever you want. But, have the respect to realize that I didn't go to your church for a reason, so.... don't bring it to me. However, I do welcome open-minded discussion on religion, if you promise not to be offended when I ask, "Why?" a billion times.


3. People that have a false sense of superiority.

Whatever happened to everyone is created equal? People seem to have a need to find a way to make themselves more superior to others. Whether is because they're in the majority or because they simply have nothing better to do, if they need to remind me of their greatness and awesomeness through words? There is a problem. They, perhaps, are not nearly as awesome as they think they are. Or they're afraid that respect is a zero-sum situation. That is someone else gains equality, then therefore someone else must lose some. Quite frankly, this quote from Homer J. Simpson does NOT fly with me: "I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are. " Nobody is perfect and the quicker the people of the world figures out that everything does not revolve around them and their belief system, the quicker we'll get to world peace. If you're desperate for attention and approval, please don't talk to me. I believe in pointing out people's flaws and hoping they'd notice that they need to fix themselve. I enjoy finding out what makes people tick and the poking them there until they cry. This is the purpose of What's YOUR Deal?!? I can't personally make the entire world cry, so please, forward my blog to your friends that need a kick in the junk. Just because you outnumber me, does not make me any less right. Fight stupid. Only you can prevent stupidity.


2. Guilt trips.

I just simply don't care. Guilt trips are so ridiculous. Why should I feel guilty about other people's stupidity? I've spent over a decade pointing out other people's stupidity, in hopes that they will change. Unfortunately, thus far... the world is winning. Do you guilty about that? I'm talking about you. Yes, you. You who have failed in your role as a human being on the planet Earth. You don't feel guilty, do you? Damn. Welcome to my world.


1. Your feelings.

And finally, I really don't care about your feelings. I don't care that I've insulted you. Because I only insult those that deserve it. And you do. No, I won't feel guilty for calling you out. No, you are not better than me. No, I'm not going to hell for believing the things I do and not believing in your insanity. And no infomercial product can possibly save you. I really do hope that you find yourself being the subject of mockery among those that sees your bovine feces for what it really is... a big steaming pile of crap.


So folks, there you have it. These are the things I don't care about. Have a good day.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Where's our moral progress now?

As I sit here typing this week's blog, I'm seeing another commercial from The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, also known as the ASPCA. They have changed up the music to their commercials. I'm glad, because after seeing this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gspElv1yvc I simply can't listen to Sarah McLachlan without tearing up. I couldn't even embed the video itself onto this blog, because seeing the sad cats and dogs still get to me. So the topic of this week's rant is, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!?" About a month or so ago, video of this woman surfaced on the interwebs: WTF? There's also a video out there of a girl throwing young puppies into a river. I absolutely refuse to post that one because it's completely disgusting and morally repugnant. And quite frankly, that girl does not need fame nor attention for that heinous action. And if you ever want to see the depravity of people who neglect their pets, just watch any episode of Animal Cops on Animal Planet. I say depravity because Ghandi once said, "The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way it treats its animals." If these people are indicative of our society, both old and young, I can see how we are heading towards doom in 2012. I say this to contrast the false moral doom that we are constantly innundated with. Every day some right wing nutjob layeth the smacketh down upon us because of something or other. Yes, Westboro Baptist Church, I'm talking about YOU. I don't think it's gay marriage destroying the moral fiber of America, it's the fact that we are so callous and cruel not just to our fellow human beings, but to the cute cuddliness of our animal brethren. Maybe I'm strange in that I actually feel more saddened by the ASPCA commercials than I do the Save the Starving Children in Africa commercials; but I do. I can't walk into a Humane Society or an Animal Shelter without feeling profound guilt and sadness that I am abandoning animals to a fate that I can't bear to think about. The thought that if those animals can't find home somewhere, they are "humanely" euthanized hurts my soul. I can't help but think, what if we did that to human children? I know, it's screwed up to think that, but if you can just keep your minds open for a few more paragraphs, I think my point would become clear. I am not advocating that we euthanize children. That's screwed up, even for me. But think about it. What would the response be if someone put a baby into a trash can for 15 hours? What would you do if you saw a someone throw babies into a river? What would the reaction be if we realized that orphanages euthanize the unadopted kids because they are overcrowded? There'd be moral outrage. The two concepts are similar, at least in my mind. Domesticated animals are essentially furry babies. They are helpless, they can't talk, and they rely on their human caretaker for everything. The only difference is that, well... they're animals and they never grow out of that stage. They're never going to learn to drive or move out of the house. Their livespans aren't nearly as long as a human's so it's not even a lifelong commitment on the human's part. But yet, cruelty to them is acceptable for far too many people. How can you hurt something as innocent as this little guy: But, someone has. Milo was adopted from a shelter by a family that I will not name. Suffice it to say, they were not kind to Milo. They adopted him and they hit him, locked him in a basement, and called him aggressive. I'm not sure how passive I'd be if I was hit and locked in a basement. At least they had the decency to try to give him away to someone else rather than throw him in a trash can or into a river or just out into the streets. As soon as I realized that was what was happening, I walked out of their house with Milo before they could even say goodbye. While a little dumb, he is an extremely sweet cat that has affection issues. Gee, I wonder why.... And he probably has a better life than some humans in this world, heck, he even has health insurance! Like Ghandi said, our moral progress is judged by the way we treat our animals. Why can't we treat animals better? I'm not even talking the big picture, Save the Whales and Endangered Double Breasted Boobie Bird or whatnot. I'm talking simply about the domesticated animals that we have kept for centuries. We can't even care for the animals we have bred to be helpless and cute. The dogs and cats that we have only share genetics with their wild counterparts. We made our pets the way they are and yet we cannot be morally righteous in the way we treat them. Pets are not disposable. They are not an inconvenience that we can just pawn off to someone else or be cruel to because they won't report you. Can you imagine our society, if we do the things we do to our domesticated pets to our own children on the same scale? I know some of you will say that these are just animals and they're overpopulated anyways. Yes, but so are humans. But you don't see us giving every child a hysterectomy or a vasectomy with their first vaccination. They are not little furry things for us to victimize because we think it's amusing or think it'd get us fame on YouTube. They are not accessories or status symbols. They are not pawns in a fight club for the rich. Domesticated animals are sentient and intelligent creatures whose only flaw in life is that they don't speak a human language to ask you, "WHAT'S YOUR DEAL?!?" So, where is our moral progress now? I'm not sure. I know where mine is. I know where it is for those people in those videos. Where's your's?

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Friendship Assault: The Hidden Danger

Going back on some of my more recent blog entries, I've realized that I've veered off course from from the origins of What's YOUR Deal?!? This is one that returns it back to its roots... enjoy...

According to Wikipedia:

"In criminal law, rape is an assault by a person involving sexual intercourse with another person without that person's consent. Outside of law, the term is often used interchangeably with sexual assault, a closely related (but in most jurisdictions technically distinct) form of assault typically including rape and other forms of non-consensual sexual activity."

Rape is something that is serious and can cause significant emotional and physical damage to the victims. It is a topic that should not be taken lightly. However, there is a similar injustice that is being perpetrated by people that we know and interact with everyday. The victims suffer emotional trauma but often have no recourse or support because no one has defined this injustice... until now.

Sexual rape and assault is a known crime and the consequences are severe. But today, I want to inform you, my tiny readership, about Friendship Rape and Assault. For those of you unfamiliar with the concept, Hyperbole and a Half did a great graphic representation of a scenario that we can all relate to, Level 3 of Social Entrapment:

Hyperbole and a Half: The Four Levels of Social Entrapment

She refers to it as The Trap. But, she does not address the aftermath of this assault. What happens to the poor man sitting with his coffee as he is victimized by Friendship Assault?

While they have similarities, the difference between a sexual predator and a friendship predator is that generally, the friendship predator does not seem to be aware of the trauma they are inflicting on those around them. We all know these people. They are the ones we socialize with because we work with them and feel obligated to do so. They are the ones that are friends of other friends. They are the people we have absolutely nothing in common with, but for some reason we pity them and befriend them. They are the old friends that you have drifted apart from, but they still think you're their best friend. They are the ones that guilt trip you into being their friend. They are the ones that read this list and think that I am talking about them and will make me feel guilty for calling them out on their own behavior. And as you are reading this list, you can envision some of the friendship predators that are in your lives. You may feel a tinge of guilt and sympathy for these people, but that is their trap. They are predators and you have just been victimized.

Friendship predators generally have low self-esteem and are socially awkward. They most likely do not know that they are friendship predators. They may believe that they are awesome and try very hard to fit into a friendship circle that they do not belong in, much to the irritation of those around them. They are the people that will read that statement and have a sudden urge to apologize to me for being a friendship rapist. Or they may get very angry at me for calling them out in this blog. Or worse, they will try to guilt me into remaining friends with them. This is a vicious cycle that must be broken. This is a bad relationship that must be ended.

True friends are people you want to hang out with and the feeling is mutual. You have common interests, you share good times and bad times, and nothing is ever held over you as blackmail. Acts of kindness are not tallies to be kept track of. No one ever knows whose turn it is to buy a meal. True friends are the people that even after a long stressful day, you're lying half-asleep in bed, and you get a phone call, you'd still throw your bra back on and rush off to help. And most importantly, true friends won't keep reminding you that they did that one time several years ago.

Friendship rapists can never let go of the past. They will remember every little thing that they ever did for you and will make you feel guilty about it. They will make themselves seem like heroes and you're the damsel in distress. Clearly, without their friendship and assistance, you would have died. Friendship rapists will regale you with stories of the good old days and how awesome that one time you did something was... but yet have nothing useful to contribute to new fantastically better memories. They try to dominate you socially and attempt to make you think that you are helpless and they are better than you.

So what can we do about friendship assault? It is clearly not a victimless crime. While there are no statistical studies to document this phenomena, I believe that the percentage of Americans affected by friendship assault is close to 100% of the population. We all know of someone that is a friendship rapist, a victim of friendship assault, or is unwittingly a friendship predator. My friends and I have established a coalition of those willing to help combat the effects of friendship assault. We have created the Friendship Assault Response Team and have had t-shirts made:

F.A.R.T. Shirt

You too, can start your own chapter of F.A.R.T. in your local area to help those like the one that Hyperbole and a Half documented on her blog.

F.A.R.T. offers several suggestions to help ease the suffering of those victimized by friendship predators:

1. Never put yourself in a situation where you are alone with a friendship predator. Call a fellow F.A.R.T. member for backup.

2. If you are alone, without backup, quickly call someone on the phone, start texting, or start doing something else to occupy yourself and use that as an opportunity to avoid contact.

3. Claims of diarrhea will almost always get you out of awkward social situations.

4. Friendship predators will never take you seriously if you just tell them that they are a waste of space, f***ing idiots, or that you will kill them if given the opportunity, among other choice words. Trying to do so, would be fruitless. Your best bet is escape and avoidance.

5. If you are a friendship predator reading this, you can stop the cycle of friendship rape. Go find other friends that may appreciate you more.


If this helps save just one victim of friendship assault, then my job is done.


NOTE: To my friends out there, if this post makes you feel guilty, then go kill yourself. Not even I can help your pitiful self-esteem. If you thought this was funny, then you are a true friend (or a delusional friendship predator).

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Aren't We All Created Equal?

Welcome to yet another edition of What's YOUR Deal?!? This marks a return to the regular format of what you have all come to expect from me: a rant, in total dismay, about the actions of the people around me. Maybe I just don't understand human behavior or maybe I'm the one with a personality disorder, but some things just don't make any sense to me. This past weekend was spent travelling and I seem to find the most fodder for my rants whenever I travel. I think it's mainly because everyone is out of their element, there is no "homecourt-advantage" for anyone. But that doesn't seem to stop people from thinking that the world still revolves around them. And it is to those people that I want to give them a hearty, "What's YOUR Deal?!?"

The fight for equality is one that we all still face. One way or another, we are all minorities in some aspect of our lives. Whether it's something physical or something within our belief system or something completely intangible, we all have something that makes us unique in the grand scheme of things. This is normal. However, the issue always seem to originate when groups of people get together and turn their minority beliefs into something big and try to impose their will upon others, generally another minority group. Before you all think I'm on another liberal rant about social justice, bear with me... you just might learn something about yourself.

I am actually writing this rant thousands of feet in the air while on Southwest Airlines Flight 2217, non-stop from Chicago Midway Airport to Los Angeles International Airport. I am not a fan of flying, not because of a physical issue or a fear of flying, but because I am forced to be in a small cramped space with a cross-section of society. My issues with the airline industry notwithstanding, I generally don't like people and quite honestly, think most people are retards. This retardation is exacerbated by being trapped thousands of feet in the air in a cramped space with a cross-section of society. And I mean absolutely no disrespect to those with actual developmental disabilities, because those people cannot do anything about their condition, however, retards are the ones that can, but choose not to.

I actually truly enjoy flying Southwest Airlines. Their service is impeccable and they don't nickel and dime you on things that should be included with the price of your airfare. They do offer early boarding for a small fee, which I enjoy capitalizing on, because then I can board early and pick my seat. I generally travel with my cat, Milo, drink entirely too much water to not have to use the bathroom in the middle of a Chicago to LA flight, and I have an arthritic right knee. I prefer sitting in an aisle seat because I can get Milo out from under the seat easily when we land, I don't shove my butt in people's faces when I need to get up and go to the bathroom, and I can stretch out my bad knee. I have those simple demands and I pay the appropriate fees to ensure that those ammenities are available to me. But does that make me any better than any of the other passengers around me? I don't really think so. But yet, other people think they are better...

I don't understand the elitism that is apparent in today's society. When I boarded Flight 2217, I was the 20th person to get on the flight, I picked my seat, near the front (HUZZAH!), aisle seat, and put Milo under the seat in front of me. As a courtesy, I warn people that want to sit near me or next to me that I have a cat, and they shouldn't sit near me if they are allergic. Nowhere in my boarding agreement does it say that I have to do that. I do it out of courtesy to the comfort of the people around me. Usually people will go, "Okay," and move elsewhere to sit if I got there first... except this time. Several minutes after telling one potential row-mate that I have a cat, this lady across the aisle from me asked, "Did I hear you say you have a cat?" Why, yes I do, I told her as I pointed at Milo. "Oh, I'm allergic, can you move?" Excuse me? Then the lady in front of me said, "Oh, I'm allergic too!" and then proceeded to repeatedly press the Flight Attendant button. I warned the people around me before I sat down, this seat was as much my right as their's were to them. It wasn't my fault that she didn't understand my initial warning that I had a cat with me.

Knowing full well that an altercation with Little Miss Elitist Jerk and Grandma Senility would just prolong my travel experience as well as guarantee me 15 seconds of fame on the news... I did not feel like dealing with it. So I starting gathering my stuff to move a few rows back to an aisle seat that was still open. I couldn't get up yet, because the aisle was still full of people trying to find seats, but Grandma Senility was still pressing that Flight Attendant call button frantically while waving her hands to get the Flight Attendant's attention. By the time he got there, she had apparently gotten livid, along with Little Miss Elitist Jerk, who initially suggested that I move rather than her. Grandma Senility was practically foaming at the dentures yelling, "She has a cat! I'm allergic to cats! I have told her repeatedly to move!" while Little Miss Elitist Jerk was chirping right along saying something about how the air will blow Milo fur at her. Apparently due to her increased age, Grandma Senility thinks repeatedly meant once. The poor flight attendant looked at me and I told him, "Look, I'm going to just move back a couple rows back, but I was just waiting until the aisle cleared."

No harm, no foul. But I don't believe that it's my fault that they're allergic to cats and were sitting near me despite my warnings that I have a cat with me. But yet, I was the better person, and moved from a seat that was rightfully mine. I paid for Milo to be on board, I paid for the right to be among to first to board, and I paid for a seat on this aircraft, just like they did. But, for some reason, they saw fit that they somehow had more of a right to stay there and make me move. Although, karma took care of me, the flight attendant gave me a free drink voucher and the person who subsequently took my old seat had a small screaming baby. Victory is still mine. But I digress.
The question to be asked here, and it is one that truly confounds me is how people can immediately assume that they are right and that their opinions hold more weight than anyone else's. I find myself in the same boat. Most of my rants are my opinions and they start steamrolling as more people read and agree with me. Does that implicitly imply that those that disagree with me are immediately wrong? No, I don't think so. Does it change my opinion that they are retards? The answer is no to that as well. Can the two thought processes co-exist? I would like to think so.

The issue lies with people assuming their position is infallibly correct, with no possible alternative and an inability to compromise. Life is not zero-sum, meaning one thought does not immediately make another impossible. Why are people so intent on holding their ground, even when evidence to the contrary exists? Or perhaps evidence of the utter inanity of their position exists? This is apparent in politics especially. Today's political climate seems to indicate that moderation is a near impossibility. Sometimes I feel bad for the President, who can't seem to be liberal enough and can't seem to appease the conservatives enough. Whatever happened to objectivity?

So, in the societal microcosm that Flight 2217 was, when I was faced with a choice of my right to be in that seat, near those people, or to be the better person, I chose to be objective. My aims were to get an aisle seat, near the front. Did it HAVE to be THAT aisle seat? No. But yet I find myself thinking, that while taking the enlightened path, I have compromised myself somehow. There's a little voice inside of me that did not want those two morons to "win" even though I was rewarded karmatically with a free beverage voucher and they were stuck with a screaming baby.

The question is now posed to you, my readers, what was the right thing to do? Fight for my right to be in that seat? Or turn the other cheek, in a manner of speaking? Or is there more to the scenario than just a simple difference in opinion? What does our opinion on this matter say about us as a society? What does this say about our belief systems and the very religions we believe in? I find myself pondering those great thoughts as I sit in this seat, a couple aisles behind where I initially wanted to be. Because one can make the same arguments for and against religions. Does the existance of one detract from the existance of another? Are Christians allergic to Muslims? Will Catholics have their eyes water and sinuses clog in the presence of a Jewish person? I don't understand why an atheist can't co-exist with someone that believes in a deity. What does our beliefs have to do with another's if there is no actual effect on their life? Why is it so important for us to impose our will upon others? What is OUR deal?!?

Saturday, July 31, 2010

The Announcement: A Confession from Poonie

At last, a long awaited "What's YOUR Deal?!?" I'm actually surprised that you are reading this. Props to all of the other people that have been requesting a new "What's YOUR Deal?!?" I'm glad I have such a loyal fan base. Please tell your friends and buy a t-shirt! This edition, much like the last one comes in a slightly different format than all of you are used to. There is no particular reason why and I will likely resume my classic, "This is what has pissed me off about the world lately," that you have all come to expect. Without further ado and by semi-popular demand, here we go little girl... on a magic carpet ride. Okay everyone, I have a secret that I have been harboring from many people and I am going to reveal it publically in this blog. Only a select few of my friends know, but it has been eating me up inside so much lately that I feel it's finally time to put fingers to keyboard and broadcast my secret to the people of the interweb. To some, what I am about to reveal will not be a surprise and to others, they may be disgusted and pray for my soul. I have come to the conclusion that I will be comfortable enough with responses from either spectrum to weather the responses. That is why I chose to compose this blog today. I'm not going to pull a LeBron James and get airtime on ESPN to announce... "The Announcement" or something. So here we go. I am secretly jealous of Sarah Palin. Yes, this is the shameful secret that I have kept hidden for the past couple of years. It all started during the 2008 Presidential Election season when then-Presidential hopeful John McCain selected his then-little known Alaskan governor running mate. Who was this woman? Little was known about her, beyond the fact that she was a woman who was the then-governor of Alaska. She was supposed to be the Republican Party answer to Hillary Clinton, to steal the Clinton votes away from Barack Obama in the November elections. Her sole purpose was just exist. But then, she started making public appearances and... *gasp* speaking in public to the media. This woman was a fool! She speaks without preparation and passes off her opinions as facts. She is an unrepentant right-wing talking head that likes to shoot animals from helicopters and believes in all the things that I don't. She hates liberal bloggers like me because we play "Gotcha!" games with people who whither in the face of facts that are contradictory to their belief systems. In every way possible, I should hate this woman. But I don't. The feeling in the pit of my stomach when I see her Twitter feed or appearances on television and hear her voice on the radio isn't loathing. It's pure unadulterated jealousy. Why should I be jealous of this woman? By all definitions I am smarter than her. I hold more educational degrees than her. And while she could see Russia from her house, I had the control of weapons that could not just blow up her house but most of the houses on the planet. I can name magazines and newspapers that I enjoy reading and for the most part, I don't need to have handwritten notes on the palm of my hand when I speak in public. WHY? Why, then, am I jealous of Sarah Palin? What's MY deal?!? I'll tell you why. Because she is Sarah f'ing Palin commanding ridiculous amounts of money to speak at public events while saying things of little worth while I'm just another anonymous blogger on the internet that reached her readership peak in college as a weekly columnist in a now-defunct campus newspaper. That is what, as Peter Griffin would say, "grinds my gears." What makes Sarah Palin better than me? To be honest, I have no idea. Allow me to do a compare and contrast. Glasses: Sarah Palin wears glasses. I wear glasses. Tie, glasses make both of us look smarter than we really are. Education: Sarah Palin attended Hawaii Pacific University in the fall of 1982 and North Idaho College in the spring and fall of 1983. She attended the University of Idaho in the fall of 1984 and spring of 1985, and attended Matanuska-Susitna College in the fall of 1985. She returned to the University of Idaho in the spring of 1986, receiving her bachelor's degree in communications with an emphasis in journalism from there in 1987. I have a Bachelor's Degree in Biological Sciences with a minor in Criminal Justice from the University of Illinois at Chicago and a Master's Degree in National Security Studies with a concentration on Terrorism from American Military University. She may have gone to more schools, but I think my educational background is more impressive. Poonie: 1 Palin: 0 Elected Office: Sarah Palin was elected governor of Alaska. I was elected Junior Class Vice President in high school. Poonie: 1 Palin: 1 Sarah Palin never finished her term. I didn't really do a good job during my term. No points either way. Controversial Family Members: Sarah Palin's daughter had a child out of wedlock with a guy that eventually posed in Playgirl magazine.  I have a "Homer-sexual" cat that likes to do bad things to Homer Simpson. Poonie and Palin... still tied. While Bristol Palin and the father of her child is more notorious, Milo is definitely cuter and can haz cheezburgers. Public Persona: Sarah Palin likes to speak out randomly about subjects that she has no background in. I like to speak out randomly about subjects that I have no background in. Again, no difference beyond the fact that she gets paid to do what she does. Celebrity Lookalikes: Sarah Palin was mocked thoroughly by the genius comedy of Tina Fey on Saturday Night Live. The celebrity I most resemble is either a Lego, or possibly Jackie Chan in drag. Maybe a Jackie Chan Lego.  Damn... Poonie: 1 Palin: 2. I suppose that's it. Sarah Palin is better than me because she temporarily ran Alaska and Tina Fey does a wicked awesome impersonation of her. And this folks, is my dirty little secret. I am insanely jealous of Sarah Palin because of the influence she wields despite the knowledge void that she has. I almost dare to say that I aspire to be like Sarah Palin because of what she has been able to accomplish with what little intellect that she has. I suppose I can grow my hair longer and put it into a bun for the librarian look. I suppose I can drop my faintly Chicago accent for a Minnesotan one. Okay, maybe not. But the simple fact of the matter is that Sarah Palin yields ridiculous influence over the uneducated masses because of some inexplicable force that allows her to sway the weak minded. I can spout bumper sticker slogans and claim that anyone who disagrees with me is picking on me too. But I won't. I can't. I know those of you that read my blog are smarter than that. I can't bring myself to arbitrarily pick something or someone to blame for all of the world's woes and have people believe me. Because if I can, I'd totally pick the Masturbating Gummy Jesus that I once found in a bag of gummies: And for me to Palin-ize my works would eat away at and destroy my soul. This is why is truly hurts me to admit that I want to be like Sarah Palin. I want to buy her book and read it openly without fear of ridicule and shame. But yet, I don't want to pay to support her because that would feel wrong to me. (And yes, for me to refuse to buy a book is pretty much a big slap on the face. In fact, I own Dennis Rodman's autobiography, "Bad As I Wanna Be.") I want to stand among the masses and say nothing of worth to roaring thunderous applause. I want to spew nonsensical gibberish on my Twitter account and have people follow me religiously. I want to be Sarah Palin. I only hope you can all forgive me and accept me for what I've just revealed today.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Revolution is scary, but evolution is inevitable...

Before I begin this edition of What’s YOUR Deal?!? I would like to preface it with several disclaimers.

Disclaimer 1: I have always had a policy of never getting too political or too critical of the United States government and the laws by which we are all bound. It’s not only that I enjoy being gainfully employed but also, I really do believe in America, through all of its faults and glory. But most importantly: THE VIEWS EXPRESSED IN THIS BLOG DO NOT REFLECT THE VIEW OF THE UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT OR ANY ORGANIZATION WITHIN. I am a bleeding heart social liberal, and if you don’t like that, you can stop reading now. Or continue and maybe learn something.

Disclaimer 2: Keeping Disclaimer 1 in mind, I’m also a social justice ninja. I don’t like seeing injustice and I don’t like seeing people perpetuating injustice because they are not adequately informed.

Disclaimer 3: This will not be one of my normal rants, because I will not violate my first Disclaimer. However, in keeping with my role as social justice ninja, this edition of What’s YOUR Deal?!? must happen, not as a rant, but as a list of observations that you can draw your own conclusions from.

Let’s begin...

*****

For those not obsessed with the news and current events like I am, recently there was the first of probably many rumblings towards the potential repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. This particular topic is very near and dear to my heart not just because I am a current events geek but also because of several factors:

1. I am a member of the United States military.

2. I am female.

3. I am a minority. (Although technically, Asian folks outnumber everyone worldwide.... minor detail.)

What do these things have to do with Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell? Well, allow me to make my observations.

As background information, here is what Wikipedia has to say about DADT:

Don't ask, don't tell (DADT) is the common term for the policy restricting the United States military from efforts to discover or reveal closeted gay, lesbian, and bisexual service members or applicants, while barring those that are openly gay, lesbian, or bisexual from military service. The restrictions are mandated by federal law Pub.L. 103-160 (10 U.S.C. § 654). Unless one of the exceptions from 10 U.S.C. § 654(b) applies, the policy prohibits anyone who "demonstrate(s) a propensity or intent to engage in homosexual acts" from serving in the armed forces of the United States, because "it would create an unacceptable risk to the high standards of morale, good order and discipline, and unit cohesion that are the essence of military capability." The act prohibits any homosexual or bisexual person from disclosing his or her sexual orientation or from speaking about any homosexual relationships, including marriages or other familial attributes, while serving in the United States armed forces. The "don't ask" part of the policy indicates that superiors should not initiate investigation of a service member's orientation in the absence of disallowed behaviors, though credible and articulable evidence of homosexual behavior may cause an investigation. Violations of this aspect through persecutions and harassment of suspected servicemen and women resulted in the policy's current formulation as don't ask, don't tell, don't harass, don't pursue.

Okay, now we all know what DADT is. In summary, gay people are allowed to serve in the current military but are not allowed to tell people that they are gay or “demonstrate a propensity or intent to engage in homosexual acts.” And no one is allowed to ask, harass, or pursue gay military personnel about their sexual orientation. While this compromise, made in 1993 is a little better than an outright ban on gay folks from serving and a little baby step forward from the olden days of mental health and undesirable discharges.

Flash forward to recent developments, according to Wikipedia:

On May 27, 2010, the U.S. House of Representatives approved the Murphy amendment[1] to the National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2011 on a 234-194 vote that would repeal the relevant sections of the law 60 days after a study by the U.S. Department of Defense is completed and the U.S. Defense Secretary, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and the U.S. President certify that repeal would not harm military effectiveness. On the same day the U.S. Senate Armed Services Committee advanced the identical measure in a 16-12 vote to be included in the Defense Authorization Act. The amended defense bill passed the U.S. House on May 28, 2010, and the U.S. Senate is expected to vote on its version in the summer. The Washington Post has stated that if the bill is approved by Congress and signed by the President, any change to don't ask, don't tell would likely not happen before 2011.

Now, as I said in Disclaimer 3, I will not rant about this. But I will now list my observations.

Observation 1:

There are gay people in the military already. DADT is not a ban on gay people. A repeal of DADT probably won’t mean a gay pride parade suddenly erupts on every military installation. Our allies allow gay people to serve openly. Our military serves alongside gay people every single day, whether or not we know it. Personnel are living in dorms, confined quarters, deployed, and showering with gay people already. Most gay people probably won’t even come out extravagantly anyways, because given how fickle the political process is, it’d be easy to repeal the repeal and suddenly the fiscally overmanned military is downsized rather quickly.

Observation 2:
While reading a fantastic book about the history of women in the military entitled: A Few Good Women: America’s Military Women From World War I to The Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, I came across this quote from Brig. Gen. Wade H. Harslip in 1941:

“Congresswoman Edith Nourse Rogers has been determined for some time to introduce a bill to provide a women’s organization in the Army. We have succeeded in stopping her on the promise that we are studying the same thing, and will permit her to introduce a bill which will meet with War Department approval. Mrs. Roosevelt also seems to have a plan. The sole purpose of this study is to permit the organization of a women’s force along the lines that meet with War Department approval so that when it is forced upon us, as it undoubtedly will be, we shall be able to run it our way.”

This is the same thing that’s going on now. Only except, there won’t be a gay organization within the military (or at least I hope not, segregation never works out for anyone). If we replace the word “women” with “gay,” Mrs. Roosevelt with President Obama, and “War Department” with “Department of Defense” this statement is as true today as it was in 1941.

As a female in today’s military, it was the pioneers from 100 years ago that has allowed me to serve my country rather than serve someone dinner. The same arguments about masculinity, social norms, and sexual interactions were made before, not for gay people but for women. It is easy to forget that a women’s role was in the kitchen waiting for her soldier, sailor, airman, and/or Marine to come home. A woman not acting in that role was a threat to the fabric of society and the family structure. Just like an openly gay person is a threat to the fabric of society and the family structure. Women joining the military didn’t make the military more feminized and giant orgies didn’t erupt in the ranks. Although, there have been historical cases of sexual misconduct, it isn’t the norm. And it’s a crime whether or not women or gays are allowed in the military. Which leads me into observation 3...

Observation 3:
To assume that gay people will suddenly want to hit on, have sex with, and/or rape everyone is also an argument that has previously been made... against heterosexual men. From the same book, it references the viewpoints of James Webb, a former Secretary of the Navy, and Marine Corps veteran. He was opposed to having women at the Naval Academy saying that Bancroft Hall was a “horny woman’s dream” and “these tendencies can be controlled in an eight-hour workday but cannot be suppressed in a twenty-four hour, seven-days-a-week combat situation.” He also said, “Introducing women into combat units would greatly confuse an already confusing environment and would lessen the aggressive tendencies of the units, as many aggressions would be directed inward, toward sex rather than outward toward violence.” The authors, Evelyn Monahan and Rosemary Neidel-Greenlee make a great point:

“If Mr. Webb is correct about people not being able to control their ‘aggressive violent and sexual nature’ for longer than an ‘eight-hour workday,’ it is a wonder that women are not being raped by men ‘who can’t be expected to act against’ what Mr. Webb considers ‘men’s nature’ on every street corner.”

While there will always be bad seeds everywhere, men or women and gay or straight, the majority tend to be quite normal and not very sexual assaulty. Women in the military have taken significant strides since World War I. Submarines in the Navy have recently become open to women. Nuclear missile crews are mixed gender. Why can’t gay people and straight people work together in a confined environment? They already do now, it’s just no one knows about it.

Observation 4:
There is something cosmically amusing about fighting crazy fundamentalist religious extremists with gay people.

Observation 5:
Admiral Mike Mullen said it best: "Mr. Chairman, speaking for myself and myself only, it is my personal belief that allowing gays and lesbians to serve openly would be the right thing to do. No matter how I look at the issue, I cannot escape being troubled by the fact that we have in place a policy which forces young men and women to lie about who they are in order to defend their fellow citizens. For me, personally, it comes down to integrity -- theirs as individuals and ours as an institution.”

Observation 6:
Congressman Todd Akin, Ranking Member of the Armed Services Seapower & Expeditionary Forces Subcommittee, released the following statement on May 27th, 2010:

“Later today, Democrats will try to sneak by one of the biggest military policy changes in decades, forcing a liberal social agenda down the throats of our military... Our military exists for winning wars, not for advancing a liberal social agenda.”

Mr. Akin is partially correct. The military had to accept more women in the early 20th century because of recruiting and retention issues, however the military also accepted more people under lower standards and waivers for criminal activity. This practice has not changed, especially in today’s world where the military is consistently doing more with less. The military does exist for winning wars and wouldn’t it make more sense to recruit and retain the best and brightest that America has to offer gay or straight, not the ones recruited and retained with a waivers and lower standards?

Historically, the military has been at the forefront of social change. Women in the military and desegregation started with the military. As a female minority in today’s military, I am grateful that the military advances liberal social agendas.

In light of my observations, I believe that there will be growing pains and it may take 100 years for gay and lesbian military personnel to truly reap the benefits of equality, much like the struggles of women and minorities in the past have had to deal with. Society will change and it is not revolution, but intellectual evolution. History has shown that military is the instrument of social change, whether or not the status quo likes it. It was the same for women and minorities. Those that don’t learn from history will be doomed to repeat it. But in this instance, I think history has it right.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Reruns are bad...

Welcome back to yet another edition of What’s YOUR Deal?!? I know, I’ve been slacking off lately and not ranting about the world despite so much fodder for ranting. But I really do try to avoid politics, not necessarily the issues behind politics, but the goings ons in Congress lately do make we want to strangle folks. No, What’s YOUR Deal?!? is really for the everyman that doesn’t necessarily pay attention to the news but just wants the mockery of the mundane and rantings for karmatic justice reflected in a little corner of the interwebs that we can all call our own. And here we go... As a child of the 80s and I have vivid memories of shows like Transformers, GI Joe, The A-Team, The Karate Kid, and Knight Rider... and today I find myself having a sudden urge to perm my hair and find a sweater with big shoulder pads. Why? Because, children of the 2000s will also grow up having the same vivid memories of shows and movies like Transformers, GI Joe, The A-Team, The Karate Kid, and Knight Rider. It’s enough to make me want to go, “Ruh roh, Raggy!” Oh wait... that’s not really Scooby Doo... This guy is. My mind is completely boggled by the bizarre time warp that I’m being fed by the Hollywood media machine. Since when was Bumblebee a Camaro? He was a yellow VW Bug! Why are GI Joes crazy half-cyborg things that more closely resemble the Borg from Star Trek, than their original intent: And since when was KITT a Ford Mustang... THIS is KITT, David Hasselhoff and all: And now we have this... At least they left the van alone... but REALLY? And why is Jackie Chan Mr. Miyagi? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMsZM-MNI1A&NR=1 Are we THAT inept at creativity that we are forced to go back to the past and dredge up our childhood heroes and inject them with CGI special effects and maybe a hearty dose of steroids and serve it up to the next generation? Because that’s exactly what we’re doing, every 20 years or so, things come back. Remember the Brady Bunch movie remakes in the 90s? Are we going to expect to see the return of the Power Rangers in this coming decade? Seriously now, people. I have to point out that THIS is what happens when we don’t foster creativity in kids and leave The Man holdin’ us down. We will be watching the same reruns for the rest of our lives. Different is good. Think outside of the box. Thank you, parents and our mind-numbing education system, for squishing that. Speaking of mind-numbing education system squishing things ... I came across this article the other day: http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/03/11/mississippi.prom.suit/ “A Mississippi county school board announced Wednesday it would cancel its upcoming prom after a gay student petitioned to bring a same-sex date to the event. ‘Due to the distractions to the educational process caused by recent events, the Itawamba County School District has decided to not host a prom at Itawamba Agricultural High School this year,’ school board members said in a statement.” and then this article: http://www.examiner.com/x-30841-DC-Culture-and-Events~y2010m3d12-Walmart-sells-black-Barbie-at-reduced-priceConspiracy-or-inventory-control Apparently Wally World is drawing flak for selling black Barbies for half the price of a white Barbie. Am I the only person that sees that these are similar issues? This is the reason why What’s YOUR Deal?!? exists. I want to stop being the only person that sees that equality and karmatic justice as inherent rights for all of humanity... and those gay penguins in China: People will go out of the way to make an issue about one set of perceived inequality but yet can turn the blind eye to someone else getting shafted. People can make an issue about anything. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m incredibly attuned to hidden messages and twisting things and using rhetoric to make a point. I mean, I saw this commercial the other night: And my first reaction was, “Wow, the minorities are the ones outside of the house wanting this magical gum and the poor Asian dude was sad because no one gave him magical white people gum.” Is Trident racist? I don’t believe they are, but if you look around and deep enough... social injustice is everywhere and is inherent. But who fights for those that are in the minority? Unfortunately, it is the minority that has to fight for attention and justice. Those in the majority have no reason to change and every reason to vilify that which they do not understand or care to get to know. They’d as soon cancel a high school prom than to risk a minority intrusion into the status quo. What is so scary about a lesbian going to prom? It happens in high schools across the country and has the world come to an end? Is there a gay epidemic where people need to wear medical masks to prevent inhaling magical gay fairy dust from gay people? Should we start vaccinating against The Gay? (Oh wait... vaccinations are evil too... I forgot.) I mean, really? Walmart immediately caved under pressure and equalized the prices of their Barbies. But who’s going to pressure Itawamba Agricultural High School to venture into the 21st century. It’s even worse to read the comments posted under these articles to see the close-mindedness that in inherent in society. If this is what we’re teaching kids today, then we are screwed in the future. People can twist words and turn things into political venom for the ages and I can’t say I’m innocent of that too. But the simple fact of the matter is that we are unjust in the manner by which we view the world. Racism is not dead, but the mere insinuation of potential racism and the backlash it will cause is enough to change something. Why can’t this girl go to prom with her girlfriend? What message is Itawamba Agricultural High School sending to the kids and the families in that community? “Sorry, you can’t have prom because of THE GAY!” How are these kids going to grow up viewing gay people? Instead of, “Hey, that’s so and so with her date,” it’s going to be, “Hey, that’s so and so and she screwed up our prom.” How is that going to help make our world better? Open your minds people. See the world from a perspective that’s not your own. (Although, sorry stupid people... I really can’t be that stupid if I tried.) If we keep rehashing the same stories and ideas from generations past, then we will never grow as a society. We have to foster change and foster innovation in order to bring out the best in humanity. Otherwise we will stagnate and repeat the mistakes we have made in history because we failed to learn lessons from them. Quite frankly... I don’t need to see more repackaged reruns, in the media and in life. And neither do you.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

The Return of What's YOUR Deal?!?

Okay fans (or whatever is left of my fanbase since my several months of hiatus from ranting), welcome to the first What's YOUR Deal?!? of 2010. I'm sure some of you are wondering what I've been up to if I haven't been pissed off at people... the short answer is: Yes. All kidding aside, there is so much stupidity in today's world that it's hard to convey into a rant that doesn't involve swearing, throwing my laptop out the window, or inciting a riot. I point out, the health care debate, the extreme right-wing, people who still don't believe President Barack Obama is a US citizen, etc. Every single day, I turn on the news and I see something absolutely ridiculous about Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, and a whole host of people who I wish I could ask, "What's YOUR Deal?!?" Those of you that have read my blog for a while know that I'm socially liberal but overall, I'd consider myself a moderate. I just want things to make sense, regardless of what someone's party line is. And everyone knows, I HATE toeing the party line.

But, the best of my rants come from the heart and personal experiences. I hate injustice in all of its forms, whether its to me, to my family, to my friends, or to anyone else in the world that I see getting the short end of the stick. I am a big fan of fairness and equity in all we do. So this What's YOUR Deal?!? returns to its roots: me serving as the social justice ninja enacting intellectual vigilante justice on those that have done someone wrong. And if you don't like it, Suck on it Trebek.



So, what has inspired me to rant? Well this one is dedicated to a friend of mine, that I believe has done nothing wrong but for some reason, was reprimanded due to someone else being a petty little weasel. I will not go into more detail, because this applies to everyone, not just this particular instance. And also, there's a possibility that the inspiration for this rant may also read this, and I would like to afford him or her the dignity of remaining anonymous to the criticism that the person would receive.

Onward!

Today's world is full of information and the sharing of information. We thrive on it. This concept is why sites like Facebook, Twitter, and various blogging sites are so popular. Unfortunately, this same concept is also what drives reality TV shows. (See one of my old rants, for my opinion on that: The Idiots Are Winning) Sometimes people do stupid things like post something on Twitter and Facebook that will get them in trouble, like someone calling in sick and then subsequently posting pictures of their drunken party escapades while they were supposedly too ill to work. Or perhaps posting pictures of affairs or status updates indicating infidelity is more to some people's morality. That kind of stuff is straight up stupid.

The next level up is the slightly ambiguous tip-toeing on the line between stupid and acceptable. In the case of this woman: Facebook Firing she was fired because she called her job boring. Wow. I suppose that can be bad, but in my opinion, rather stupid. But, I'm not an expert on pettiness. I wouldn't recommend degrading your job regularly on Facebook because well, if you hate it that much, why don't you quit? And if it's not that bad, then... well, there are better places to complain about work than to broadcast it to the world.

And then there's the category of people posting innocent things in their status or Twitter of them enjoying life. I don't see anything wrong with that because, well, that's what it's for. How many times have we posted pictures of fun times with friends and family or a status update announcing something fantastically joyous? That's what that stuff is for. It's for us to keep up with friends and family we can't afford to call everyday and tell them everything about our lives.

What that is NOT for are the petty people who are so insecure in their own happiness and job security that they feel like they must narc on someone feeling joy so that they can get some personal gain out of it. What's YOUR deal?!? These people piss me off. Where do you get off judging someone? Or tattling on them when what they were doing was perfectly legitimate. "I'm having fun on my day off," shouldn't be grounds for a reprimand. Mind your own business you snivelling little social outcast that's apparently jealous that you didn't get invited to hang out with the cool kids. WTF is wrong with the world today? People are seemingly so afraid that the joys and happiness of others will somehow make their own life more miserable. Sorry, dude or dudette, newsflash: other people have a right to be happy. And you can:



I think this issue is not just in the realm of Facebook and Twitter and other social networking sites. It's the reason why America is in the state that it is, with the extreme right wing telling people health care will kill grandma and why gay marriage will cause straight divorce or whatever crazy ridiculous justification people come up with to deprive people of happiness. Are we as a society so joyless and so sad that the moment something good is happening to someone else, we are so jealous and enraged that we must do everything in our power to put an end to it? Do we have to scour Facebook and Twitter for posts from our friends and co-workers in a quest to find some dirt to use against them? Are we so desperate to do so that we practically make stuff up about other people so that it sounds worse than it is just to make ourselves feel better and important? Are we so cowardly about such things that we dare not confront people as individuals to their face, but rather stabbing them in the back? Is that who we are?

I really hope not. But something tells me that this blog and others like it, calling people out for such idiocy will be very gainfully engaged for the foreseeable future. You people sicken me... and if you have a problem with that, tell me to my face. I want the pleasure of telling you this: