Mmmm…. McRib…
No, I didn’t get a job at McDonald’s this summer… that’s my post-graduation aspiration (kidding). But it is that time of year again when the McRib returns to the McDonald’s menu. It seems almost as if they can only serve processed meat covered in artificially flavored sauce only during the summer. And anyone with a brain KNOWS that’s not true. So what makes this particular sandwich so special that is can only exist for a few fleeting months out of the year? That is truly the million dollar question.
But surprisingly, the temporary McRib has captured the attention of the public and pop culture by being spoofed by The Simpsons with Homer’s obsession with the Krusty Burger’s version: the Ribwich. And even more surprising there are webpages online devoted to this little sandwich! But then, maybe that’s not as surprising, seeing as there are websites devoted to everything under the sun and then some. For a sandwich introduced in 1981 on the permanent McDonald’s menu and have subsequently been only around when their head honchos got a hankering for some processed pork product, it has managed to maintain some semblance of staying power.So what is the secret behind the McRib? Why can’t we have it all the time? Is it really as hopeless additive and made with glowing, radioactive pork goo as The Simpsons suggest? It is actually made with the real meat of some soon to be extinct animal? It’s like the Tootsie Roll Pop question… the world may never know. But regardless of why the McRib only lives long enough to tempt us with its delicious processed porkness, it is a damn good sandwich! I don’t care where it comes from or how many endangered animals need to be killed, I want my damn McRib!!! Anyone with me?
Who Gets To Pick Those Smileys?
It’s the age of technology and most people communicate with instant messaging programs. It’s cheaper than a phone call and quicker than e-mail or a letter. But the nagging question is that who gets to pick the random 16 smileys that are available on AOL Instant Messenger? I mean, the standard :-) , :-D , :-P , and ;-) are always useful. But who really uses most of those? I mean, what IS the deal with that one smiley that looks like it’s high?! Why can’t there be useful smileys like perhaps a raised-eyebrow smiley? There are smileys for the happy people, the really happy people, the sad people, the crying people, and the angry people… but never is there one for the people in between. In an age where we prefer not to actually interact with people, the lack of certain smileys on IM programs is a great disservice to the general populace. The lack of vital artificial facial expressions might actually compel us to… actually go and… interact with humanity! Oh the horror! And all we really wanted was something that looks like this: ,:-\ Is that too much to ask for?
Speaking of Wants…
How did tickets to baseball games ever get this expensive? People are paying thousands of dollars to watch prime games like Cubs vs. Yankees, Sox vs. Cubs, or the All-Star Game this year at Comiskey (It’s STILL Comiskey!). Maybe I’m a cheap, poor college student, but I can’t ever fathom a time where I’ll be willing to fork over a semester’s worth of tuition at UIC to sit in a ballpark for about 3 hours, pay for overpriced food, and watch a bunch of guys hit a ball with a stick. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love baseball and I’m a diehard Sox fan. But damn, that’s a lot of money to be spent for games I want to see. If people refused to pay the price of scalped tickets, then the scalpers won’t sell them for exorbitant prices. If the fans won’t pay then the Cubs won’t rip fans off by conspiring with their own ticket scalping broker. It’s the age of concept of supply and demand. I know, everyone DOES want to go see the Cubs and Yanks, and the Sox and Cubs play… myself included. Tickets shouldn’t go to the highest bidder, but they should go to the fans that are willing to stay in line to buy them. Those were the good old days. But now if most fans can’t afford to go see a game… there’s no point to it.
