Why Must We Celebrate Stupid?

Again folks, I'm going to be busy tomorrow, so here's another early edition of "What's YOUR Deal?!?" for your weekend enjoyment. But before we begin, I'm going to answer some questions that people have about my blogs. Yes, I actively search out weird news stories to rant and rave about. My sources of choice are usually cnn.com and Yahoo! News. I also make an effort to watch Rachel Maddow on MSNBC every weeknight because we share the same opinions and taste in what is mock-worthy in today's news. It also just so happens that the anti-gay rights movement is especially rant-worthy because... well... two words: Gay Penguins. If gay penguins is so threatening to everyone's sexuality, relationships, and marriage... maybe it's time to look deep within ourselves to contemplate where our fear of penguins come from. Anyways, on to this week's topic.. the celebration of stupid. Another take on this topic can be found on my friend Denise's Facebook. Check it out: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=684524116#/note.php?note_id=106027054504 Last weekend, the annual Miss America pageant was held and I hope I wasn't the only one openly gawking with my jaw-dropped at what I was seeing and hearing. No, not in that way you sex-starved perverts. See, it's thoughts like those that inhibit the rights of gay penguins everywhere. But seriously? That is the best that America has to offer? Miss America, the title of which implies that these women are not just the best their individual states have to offer but also potentially the woman chosen to represent women across America. And it's people like this: Yes, I know that was an oldie but goodies from a couple of years ago, but that's not any worse than Miss California 2009's rumbling, bumbling, stumbling, rambling about "same-sex marriage" and "opposite marriage." Or perhaps her country of California. What exactly is opposite marriage? Isn't that just being single? And then she had the gall to insinuate that she lost the Miss America title because she didn't cater to the gay rights movement. No, dumbass... it's not because you didn't cater to the gay rights movement but because you SOUND LIKE AN IDIOT! I don't care (well, maybe I do.. just a little) that you don't believe in gay marriage, but at least have the decency to TRY to put together a logical argument for or against it. It's not your opinion that I have an issue with... it's the idiocy behind it. Sidebar: Question, is it a pre-requisite to have a glazed over look to be in beauty pageants? Like with your eyes pointing opposite directions? I know I can't make fun of that too much, because I think my cat is the most adorably beautiful creature on the planet and he suffers the same affliction: Back on topic... I know that these are supposed to be beauty pageants not debate competitions, but if all you're really judging on is superficial appearance, why even bother having these women speak? Why does society hold these women to a higher pedestal than say Rachel Maddow? Not to say anyone ever really remembers the names of Miss Americas or even can tell the difference between them and perhaps a Playboy Bunny of the Year... the fact remains that most people would hold the title of Miss America higher than political commentator. Although, that would make a fun trivia game... A list of names and trying to match them to former Miss America or former Playboy Bunny. I digress. We're a society of mindless people saying, "Oooh, pretty!" and ignoring the substance. I'm sure everyone is familiar with LOLCatz. If not the term, then this picture should jog your memory: We're so drawn to the attractive or cute image that our brains apparently completely turn off. "Ooooh, cute kitty!" Cute kitties don't use bad English. Miss Americas shouldn't be brain dead either! I know I'm as guilty as the next person of IMing or texting in short hand. Using "Ur" instead or "your" or "you are" and my abundant use of "prolly." But I also have the understanding that PROLLY is NOT a real word. At least not yet, you never know what bastardized English word will be added to Webster's Dictionary in any given year. That is NOT acceptable for writing a letter or an e-mail or writing on Ebay or Craigslist or even for a personal ad unless you want to share with the world that you are RETARDED. If you're going to sit down and take the time to compose something, then at least have the decency to write in complete sentences using complete and REAL ENGLISH WORDS. "I Can Has Cheezburger" is funny when put it over a picture of a fat cat, but if you're writing to me and you're too lazy that turn that Z into an S and add a freakin' E, you're telling me that I'm not worth that extra millisecond of your time. That isn't just a typo folks, it's pure laziness and it has become acceptable because we let it be. I don't want to have to decipher what you're sending me because it's not in English. It's like trying to figure out what people's license plates say. I've tried to learn Ebonics... but retard typing speak... sheesh, that's too much for my brain. We need to stop accepting laziness and stupidity as the standard for American behavior. Brain dead Miss America contestants does not represent me and for the love of all that is good, I hope she doesn't represent you either. I'm glad you're taking the time to read this blog, you're on the path of recovery. Now go read a book or watch the news.